Saturday, December 24, 2011

Montreal Canadiens: My Christmas Wish List

Santa Claus - Christmas Decorations in New Jersey
I would like to think that I am a very rational man.

My emotions very rarely get the better of me, unless I am crying during Extreme Makeover Home Edition. I am the type of person who takes in information, processes it through reason and then responds.

Sure I am an odd ball when it comes to my thought process, but for the most part I am the type of person who reacts only after careful deliberation.

In the blogging world this can be a serious issue. There can be perception of always being late to the ball, but I see it differently. Why read and react when you can read, assess, re-assess, deliberate and then react.

Another quality of mine is the ability to admit defeat or admit when I am wrong.

So with that said, I apologize. I was wrong.

When the Montreal Canadiens first announced the hiring of Jacques Martin I was a very happy camper.

After years of rookie disasters we finally had a man behind the bench with a record of success and strength.

Despite the omnipresent criticism of our general manager, I was also a supporter of Pierre Gauthier.

Perhaps this was because I have a pattern of going against the grain or perhaps it was just a momentary lack of clairvoyance. Either way, with this confession I feel the weight of a 400lbs gorilla removed from my chest.

Yet, despite this confession, a sense of disgust and rage continuously plagues me during this holiday season.

These are feelings that I no longer want to have in my life so I humbly sit here and ask for help. I am in a time of need and so ask that, as I wake up on the morning of December 25th, 2011, that underneath my Christmas tree as well as my stocking are filled with this simple wish list.

The List

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy in 2011 and ask for the following:

1) Please give the strength to Mr. Molson to reach deep into his pockets and outright fire this staff. From Mr. Gauthier to Mr. Cunneyworth to the assistant coaches. The organization has a lack of vision, and the young players are not developing as they should.

2) As a follow up to my first wish, I would be especially happy if you could allow Mr. Molson to offer the role of General Manager to Pierre McGuire and bring back Larry Robinson in a capacity of assistant coach for the defence.

3) Can you please change the Habs' training staff? Not only are they among the league leaders in man games lost to injury almost every year but the recovery process always seems to be longer than any other club. On top of that, a number of key players seem to be re-aggravating injuries due to improper monitoring .

4) Can we please get a roofer on the payroll? I am fed up of spending money and draft picks repairing a leaking roof instead of just outright changing the roof. Enough is enough.

5) Can we please get some much needed toughness to both the forward and defensive units? It is unacceptable that Petteri Nokelainen leads this team in fighting majors and poor Travis Moen is the lone pugilist against most clubs. The Canadiens need help.

6) Please remove the name of Mathieu Darche for my memory. I watch the game  five-on-5 and he’s there. I watch the PK or the PP and he’s there. I think this morning I woke up to make breakfast and he had already moved into my bed. Please, no more Mathieu Darche.

7) Can Alexei Emelin be allowed to play in a position where he is comfortable? He was playing extremely well when he was paired with Raphael Diaz on the left side of the ice. Maybe we should give this a shot.

8) Can we please change this policy of not negotiating during the season? Josh Gorges needs to be locked up to a multi-year deal right now.

9) Can Michael Cammalleri finally be sent packing? It was a bad idea getting this guy in the first place, despite his playoff success. I would trade him right now to LA for Dustin Penner and a good pick. Make it happen.

10) My final request: Can I please get a Stanley Cup that I can actually remember? We have not won the cup this century and I am getting fed up of non-hockey markets hoisting the cup. Please allow the Habs to get better and reward this rabid fan base.

Bryan is a Marketer by day, writer for by night and full time fan of the game. Follow me on twitter @BryanWilley78 but don't bother looking for me on Facebook, I'm just too old for that now!

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i was completely with you until you fired cammy; don't trade a player based on half a bad season. he was an asset last season and we can't be blaming 1 lw for the wreck of les habitant.

does L.A. even want him back? but anyway ..... now that i've defended the man, Penner is not a bad idea..... rant over, keep up the excellent work and tell Kamal i said the same. Merry Christ-mas all!!!!!! And Habby New Year!!!!!

yes Bryan, if we trade Cammalleri, we need to receive at least something useful in return. Penner is a useless player and he's not physical at all despite his size!

Hilarious and spot-on from 1 thru 10! And to those who wish to defend Cammalleri, it's not his lack of production that is the issue, but a genuine absence of commitment, passion and urgency in his play. He's supposedly one of the leaders, but he seems more concerned with making an impact with the social media than his teammates.

I know I was gonna take slack for wanting Cammalleri out for Penner. My reasoning here is Penner will be let go at seasons end so we save the cap space am also get what I think is a 1st round pick.

I'd rather have the money guaranteed for Gorges and a gritty 3rd liner then to have Cammalleri next season.

I'm with Bryan. Cammy has to go... and I suspect he wants to go. Penner is a fine return because he is a brief commitment. We use the cash we were spending on Cammy next yea. Takers for Cammy are not going to be plentiful. Give me Penner and a pick, or better yet, Penner and some brawn and you can have Cammy.

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